Catanna, Novice of the Dark Arcana

Full Glory Waifus is the best selling product we stock at Caffeine Critical. This can largely be attributed to the high quality of the cards. Anyone who's opened these packs can attest that they're colorful, vibrant, and beautifully explicit. However, it takes more than pretty artwork to make an anime character a Waifu. 

For an anime babe to be a Waifu, she needs personality, the kind of personality that can be expressed without speaking. You just see the character depicted and you know what she's all about. This accurately describes Catanna, Caffeine Critical's own original Cat-Girl. From the fishnet gloves and stockings, to the devious fangs in her open mouth smile, Catanna bleeds personality.

However there's only so much you can learn about a girl from seeing her picture, even if she is fully nude in that picture. So in this article I'm going to flesh out every intimate detail about Catanna, novice of the Dark Arcana.

What exactly is 'Dark Arcana'? Witchcraft of course! We're talking Eldritch witchcraft involving summoning circles and incantations from decrepit old spell-books. Catanna is absolutely obsessed with this sort of thing. Her idea of a good time is being out under the midnight moonlight, lighting candles, drawing pentagrams, and conjuring up something diabolical.

Catanna's primary shortcoming is that she's never had any formal training, and learned all that she knows through trial and error. An error when using dark magic is nothing like an error when using a microwave or playing a video game. There are very serious consequences to mistakes made when doing witchcraft. Horny Eldritch Tentacles can spring forth from the deepest depths of the astral dimension to violate and desecrate an amateur spellcaster.

Aside from casting spells and getting ravaged by tentacles, is there more to Catanna? Of course there is! She enjoys the thrill of flying through the sky on broomstick, preferably topless so as to feel the chill of the night air on her perky nipples. She also enjoys brewing potions which she both drinks and bathes in to maintain a youthful glow.

What else is there to be said about the petite white-haired witch? Are there any secrets she wouldn't want you to know about? Perhaps one or two. She used to be a regular human girl, still goth, but not a kitty. A transmutation spell went awry and left her permanently changed. Also don't touch her ears, she hates it and she'll bite you. 

If you want to learn more about or see more of Catanna, she currently has 18 cards in the Full Glory Waifus base set, 1 card in Enter the Waifu-Verse, and 12 cards in the Pussy-Cat Promo Pack. These products are all available in the Waifu Cards section of the online store. Thanks for reading and I hope you have a magical day!